Cancer will bring pain and misery, but accepting that this is just part of life’s contrast will bring us some peace.
Expecting Life To Always Be Good
Somehow we grow up expecting that we should always feel good. Don’t cry, we are taught as kids. Or just “be happy.” However, this false narrative has set us up for unrealistic expectations. When life is not good, then we feel extra bad. We feel bad because of what is happening and we feel bad because we feel like it shouldn’t be this way.
Watching My Husband In Misery
My husband is undergoing treatment for stage IV cancer and recently was in such pain it was heartbreaking to see him. He was weak and could hardly walk or speak. I remember thinking that he has had his fair share of pain, why does he have to suffer more? I was miserable seeing him this way and constantly thinking that it shouldn’t have to be so hard!
Once I stopped wishing the circumstance was different and just accepted that this is the painful part of his journey some of my misery lifted. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t feel good about seeing him in pain, but I stopped trying to argue with it. This was our reality right now and maybe this is how its supposed to be. This thinking allowed me to accept it instead of trying to resist it so much.
50% Pain / 50% Pleasure
Life is not supposed to be pleasure and joy all the time. Life is supposed to include sadness and suffering. They are what make joy and happiness possible. Half of life will be great and the other half will suck. It is this contrast that makes our experience as human beings complete. When you remember this contrast, it will enable you to stop resisting the part of life that sucks. When we resist the painful part of life, we actually make our experience worse. Accepting that it’s just the 50% part that sucks and it will pass will actually bring you some peace.
Which Half Are You In?
Ask yourself which half of life are you in right now, the painful part or the sucky party? If it’s the latter, then remember the contrast of life and stop resisting. Life will include both experiences and that is how it should be.
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