The future only exists in our minds. So why do we often imagine the worst?
When you are in the thick of it with your husband and cancer, it’s so difficult to even think about the future. The only future in your mind is just the next treatment date, the next chemo session, or the next hospital stay.
Feeling Sorry For Myself
While my husband was overseas getting treated at a cancer clinic, we went through a period of time where the future was totally unknown. The treatment plan was changing daily and we had no idea when he would be coming home. I felt frustrated by this lack of plan. People would ask, how’s he doing? When is he coming home? I had no answer. Nor did he. So mostly I just didn’t think about the future. Or sometimes I felt sorry for myself.
Future Only Exists In Our Minds
Then I was reminded that the future only exists in our heads. Truly, none of us knows our future. Sometimes we think we do because most of us expect our future to be a continuation of our past. But if it only exists in our minds, why not imagine something greater?
So I have been imagining me, my husband, and my daughter sitting on the beautiful deck of our new home. We are sitting around a cool stone fire pit and drinking wine while my daughter enjoys a hot chocolate. It is a beautiful quiet evening. We are all happy and healthy and just enjoying family time together.
Create Your Future
We live into the future we hold in our heads. Why not make it better than the past? So many people want to “prepare” for the worst by imagining it ahead of time. Rarely do we create a better future to imagine. Anything can always happen. This is no more true when you are dealing with cancer than when you are not. Yet, we are so reluctant to dream of a brighter future. But this is exactly how our futures are created, first with the dreams in our heads.
Imagine a future you want and think of it often. It does not have to be a grand dream but just a future that is better than your present. Maybe it includes an “all clear” report from the oncologist. Or maybe it is just the family trip you’ve been wanting to take.
I have no idea how or when we will have that new home with the beautiful deck and fire pit, but I think about it a lot. Especially when I find myself getting mired down in the present. I want to live into that future.
So find your better future and live into it.