COVID-19 Changed Everything
With this pandemic, you might be feeling like you are in a holding pattern. Most of our regular routines have been disrupted. Many things we can no longer do and others like work and school have been totally changed. For your spouse, certain treatments or a planned surgery may also be on hold.
In many ways, it feels like our “regular life” has stopped and we’re now in a “temporary” life. The uncertainty about the future makes it difficult to make plans. You feel as if you are just waiting for it all to be over so life can get back to normal.
Predictability Is Comfortable
There is a reason we want our lives to be predictable. Our brain likes routine and habits. It likes to be efficient and do the same things over and over again.
When we are thrown out of our routine, it feels very disconcerting. It takes less energy when we know what to expect, so of course you want things to get back to how they were, pre-pandemic. It’s not you, it’s just how your brain is wired!
Unconsciously On Hold
Sometimes we unconsciously put ourselves in a holding pattern because it is easier to not be present. If we were present, then we’d have to feel and experience the isolation or loneliness we may be feeling. We’d have to face the fear we’ve been holding at bay. It’s much easier to just focus on a future when we are all through this and life goes back to normal.
Being Present To Your Life Now
The problem with trying to wait this out, is that by doing so, you become less present to the life that is happening now.
This pandemic is not an anomaly. It’s not a glitch in the program that we call life. Sure, it’s not exactly common, but history shows us there have been many throughout time. Pandemics happen and people get cancer. You may not have been expecting either to affect your life, but life is good at keeping us on our toes!
This Is Life
There are always ups and downs in life. Somehow we forget this. When bad things happen, we want to argue and assert that they shouldn’t be happening. We want to argue with the reality that life has presented to us. Or we just want to hide from it.
We forget that life is supposed to be hard. Along with the joy, there is pain. Along with health, there is illness.
When we are waiting for a better future, we miss the experience of the present. We miss what we can learn from it, how we can grow.
Getting Off of Hold
- Ask yourself if you have put part of your life on hold. Recognize that you have been waiting till it’s all over. Even if it’s only a part of your mind, it’s important to see these thoughts in your head and acknowledge that they are there.
- Understand why and have some compassion for yourself. It’s human nature to try to avoid our negative feelings. What is it you don’t want to feel?
- Decide to be present for the life that is happening now by asking yourself better questions:
How can I make the most of this time?
What do I want to learn from this?
Who do I want to be for myself and my family?
We only ever have the present moment. Don’t let yours slip away!
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